The big sister, a confessed worrier and (shamefully) the procrastinator!

It’s in days like this one when I need a can of Coke. I need the kick that I used to get from drinking it. But since I quit drinking any kind of softdrinks or soda since January 1, 2010, I vowed never to go back to my bad habit. I vowed I won’t sip even a tiny bit of that kind of drink.

That kick would have driven me to write like a maniac for sure but the side effect is not worth that kind of creative phase I’d be in.

Sigh.

I still wish I could drink even just one can. I can but I won’t. What a brick of sh!t I am in!

I don’t know why I am pretending to be interested with some persons I follow on Twitter. They are annoying! Some give out too much information about what’s happening in their lives. Can you imagine one person sharing conversations she’s having with her husband? And then there’s this older woman whom I’ve known for quite a while who is turning to be a source of irritation to me. She’s posting so much stuff that almost always include a word or two that is totally out of character. Jologs lang sobra!

I know I can easily un-follow them all. But I guess that this ingrained courtesy and politeness in me will always be in the way of being honest about my feelings.

Oh, well!

Whenever I hear of someone, be it a well-known personality or an ordinary person, who throws away his life like it’s nothing and he can get it back again anytime he wants to, I get angry. I am sorry because I know it’s their lives to live the way they want to but it just makes me angry knowing that there are so many others who are clinging to dear life and fighting to stay alive even for a day or two. There are so many individuals out there playing with drugs, alcohol and other destructive substances, playing cat and mouse with death like their lives meant nothing to them, some even ending their lives for a very shallow reason…

Loved ones died of cancer and other really bad internal organ diseases. They fought hard. They tried every possible avenue for them to stay alive longer but were not given a chance to recover. I’ve seen them suffer. I’ve seen them cling to life. Can you blame me for being angry with those who take their lives for granted and treat it like they have another life to use when the one they are living now go kaput?

Take care of the only life you have. Fight for life! While you are throwing away yours, a million others are fighting, clinging and working hard to save theirs.

Keep that in mind when you are playing cat and mouse with death.

Almost each and every mass I attend I end up being disappointed with. Do you know why? The priests are almost always not prepared for the service! I don’t know why the head of the Philippine Catholic church is not reprimanding those priests. Instead of inspiring the flock to get to know the Lord more, the parishioners end up sleeping during the sermon. Once or twice I’ve been in that situation.

In my opinion, the priests should exert an effort in preparing for the mass. They should prepare for the homily. It’s their ‘job’! It’s their vow! How come they always mouth words and not really talk about God?

If I were a weaker member of the church, I would have bolted out by now. But I remain hopeful. I am keeping the faith.